Be ye as a little child

This is just one of those days. You know the kind when you know there is something "more" for you to do but you have no idea how to go about doing it. I think I have some understanding of what "it" is, but it just seems as though the doors are shut and I can't get them open to make anything happen.

This is another classic case of me, trying to do it. Me being busy and scurrying around, looking for the one door that will get me to where I think I should go. All the while the anxiety is building and I feel more and more frustrated. And because things don't look the way I think they should, I feel like a failure. I'm disappointed and in the frustration of my feelings I find myself blaming God. Why are you asking me to do this if you're not making the way for it?

The truth is, God doesn't ask anything of us without providing the way. Usually what happens looks very much like when I ask one of my children to do something for me. As I begin to ask one of my kids if they will help me with something, they are often off and running to go do what I asked when I haven't even gotten half way through what I was asking them for. So that when they return they have often either not done what I asked or they come back asking me questions because they don't know how to do what I asked them to. Does this sound familiar?

As a parent, I want my child to be still, listen to all of my instructions and then ask any questions they may have before they go and do what I ask of them. God is our father, as a parent himself; would he want anything less from us, his children? So at times like these, when I don't know how to do what my heart is strongly telling me to do, I am to become as a little child.

Perhaps, like a child, I am confused because I did not listen long enough to get all of my instructions. And maybe either from excitement or dismay over the request, I forgot to ask the questions that would clarify things for me. So when we find ourselves in moments like these, God hasn't abandoned us to our fate but is rather patiently waiting for us to return for the further instructions that will turn confusion into clarity and dismay into excitement.

The scriptures say that we are to be as little children and children can be very eager which is good. But sometimes a child is so eager they forget to be patient. The scriptures also advise moderation. Maybe these are experiences where God is teaching us to temper our eagerness with patience so that with the two, we may have the eagerness to go forth and do the work and the patience to see it through to the end.

As it is, I think it's time for me to go and have a conversation with my father. Wish me luck! After all, it's St. Patrick's Day.