Quotes to live by

“If you attempt to be better than yourself, you will have more success than if you attempt to be better than someone else.” ~ Unknown Author 

Being Grateful for the Peaches in Your life!

I love spending time with my children. One of the ways I do this is by watching movies with them. This is something my mom and I used to do on the weekends. One movie I’ve watched with my children is Kung Fu Panda. Did you ever think you could find a profound truth while being entertained with your children?

Well, there’s a part of the movie where two characters are talking, a teacher Master Shifu; a red panda, and his mentor Oogway; a turtle. Master Shifu is training Po; a fat panda he believes can never be the mystical dragon warrior. He has an idea of what the dragon warrior looks like and it is not Po. He can only see Po for who he appears to be and not for what he can or may be. Master Shifu is having a hard time letting go of control and trusting that there is a higher power at work helping things to be, just as they need to be. They are standing in a garden by a peach tree when they have this discussion.

Oogway looks to Shifu and says, “My friend, the panda will never fulfill his destiny, nor you yours until you let go of the illusion of control.” “Illusion?” asks Shifu. “Yes” says Oogway as he points to the peach tree. “Look at this tree, Shifu. I cannot make it blossom when it suits me nor make it bear fruit before its time.” “But there are things we can control. I can control when the fruit will fall” Shifu says as he knocks fruit off the tree, “I can control where to plant the seed; that is no illusion, Master!” “Ah, yes”, replies Oogway, “But no matter what you do, that seed will grow to be a peach tree. You may wish for an apple or an orange, but you will get a peach.” “But a peach cannot defeat Tai Lung!” Shifu emphatically explains. “Maybe it can, if you are willing to guide it, to nurture it, to believe in it”, says Oogway as he tries to get Shifu to understand. “But how? How? I need your help, master”, Shifu implores. “No, you just need to believe. Promise me, Shifu, promise me you will believe”, asks Oogway as he leaves.

There are times in our lives when we cannot look past the appearance of something or the expectation of what we are looking for. For example, when I started studying the Book of Mormon to gain a testimony of its truthfulness, I had an expectation of what the answer should look like. It took me many months of searching, pondering, and praying before I was able to receive my answer. And when the answer came, it did not look anything like what I had expected. I was looking for apples or oranges when it was in fact a peach. It seemed the more I prayed and sought out an answer, the more peaches I got. And every time a peach came along, I would toss it aside saying, “This isn’t what I was looking for” until I had a mountain of peaches. It took the Lord being very bold and loud to get me to look past my expectations and see what He was showing me.

Now this is an instance of seeking personal revelation. But how many other kinds of instances do we walk into a situation or see a person with an expectation of what it or they have to look like. When we do that we miss out on so much and it will generally take us longer to receive the very thing we are searching for. As great as apples or oranges are, isn’t a peach just as wonderful. And how much more wonderful is it, if it is the very thing we stood in need of.

In Max Lucado’s book “Cure for the Common Life”, he uses this analogy to explain how we miss out in our relationships by assuming what a person’s life should look like.

            A gardener gave a seedling to his friend, the orange grower. “Consider this a gift.” An orchestra conductor presented a package to her favorite cellist. “Just because I appreciate your work,” she told her. An artist thanked a plumber for his neighborliness by giving him a present.

            And so the orange grower, the cellist, and the plumber unwrapped their gifts.

            The orange grower planted the seedling, anticipating oranges. After all, he grew oranges, so this must be an orange-tree-to-be. But the plant spread into bushy, clustered branches. The orange grower couldn’t coax a single orange out of his grove. He sprinkled it with orange-tree fertilizer, sprayed it with orange-tree bug spray. He even poured orange juice on the soil. But alas, no oranges. Tomatoes, yes. But oranges, no. He felt like a failure.

            The cellist empathized. She had expected a cello. She was somewhat correct. The package contained an accordion. She treated the accordion like a cello, setting the base on the floor and running her bow across the keys. Noise came forth, but no music. She was less enthused.

            As was the plumber. He expected a gift of wrenches and hammers, but he was given a brush and palette. Puzzled, he set out to repair a leaky pipe with his new tools. But brushes don’t open valves, and a palette won’t tighten joints. He painted the plumbing and grumbled.

            Each assumed the gift would be what they knew rather than what the giver gave.

            Each year God gives millions of parents a gift, a brand-new baby. They tend to expect oranges, cellos, and plumbing tools. Heaven tends to distribute tomatoes, accordions, and paint supplies. Moms and dads face a decision. Make our children in our images? (I would like to add, and our images for them) Or release our children to follow their God-given identities?

Now Max is speaking to parents about their children, but I believe this applies to any relationship. How often are we looking at the people in our lives with an expectation of what they have to look like and what their lives must be like? I believe we do this not meaning to harm but trying to help ensure their happiness. But who are we to decide what that image is. Isn’t that God’s job? How often do step on the agency or dream of another person in our desire to help them be what we expect? And how do we know that our expectations will make them happier than God’s plans for them?

Max says that, “parents can prepare the soil and sow the seed, but God gives the growth. Show them the path? Yes. Force them to take it? No.” Following this example he says, “…learn to love tomatoes, appreciate the sound of an accordion, take art supplies to the canvas, not the sink, and view each child as a book, not to be written, but to be read.”

Here are two different sources, one is a cartoon, the other a book, but I believe that both are helping us to see a truth. That when we have an expectation of what something or someone has to look like, we become blind to the very things we search for and create our own heartache from the frustration of unfulfilled desires. It is only when we let go and open ourselves to all possibilities, whatever they may be, and trust in God, that He is able to provide what we are searching for.

So the next time you find yourself becoming frustrated because your answer wasn’t an apple or the person in your life wasn’t an orange, take a moment and ponder that there are just as many reasons to celebrate the peaches in your life, as a gift from God who always knows just what is best. Then go out and learn to be grateful and love them anyway, just as they are, in whatever form your peach comes in.

I believe that once you have an ‘intention’ with the desire of paying ‘attention’ to what God desires, you are then on the road to creating the kind of lasting joy that comes from serving and giving love without design or desire of an expectation. Once you do this, you will begin to see the doors and windows of heaven open and bring you the very things you desire.

And when life hands you peaches, make peach cobbler!

The Angel in You

I just began reading this book today called Random Acts of Kindness. It contains quotes and stories from many different authors and sources. The foreword was written by Daphne Rose Kingma. This touched my heart so much and correlates with my last post so well, I just had to share it with you in its entirety.

To Become an Angel by Daphne Rose Kingma

            Random acts of kindness are those little sweet or grand lovely things we do for no reason except that, momentarily, the best of our humanity has sprung, exquisitely, into full bloom. When you spontaneously give an old woman the bouquet of red carnations you had meant to take home to your own dinner table, when you give your lunch to the guitar-playing beggar who makes music at the corner between your two subway stops, when you anonymously put coins in someone else’s parking meter because you see the red “Expired” medallion signaling to a meter maid – you are doing not what life requires of you, but what the best of your human soul invites you to do.

            Most of us try hard to fulfill our obligations in life, to be responsible parents, to reward and discipline our children, to assist our employees or colleagues, to support and comfort our spouses, to do our share of the work at the office and at home. But these deeds are what we’re expected to do, what in fact we have agreed to do because of the mates we have chosen, the lives we have decided to live. They come, in effect, with the territory. To be reasonable, decent, civilized human beings who maintain the stability of our lives and our relationships, we must and we will do all these ordinary things.

            But it is when we step outside the arena of our normal circumstances, when we move beyond the familiar emotional and circumstantial boundaries of our lives that our kindnesses, too, move beyond the routine and enter the realm of the extraordinary and exquisite. Instead of being responsible good deeds they become embodiments of compassion.

            To become the perpetrator of random acts of kindness, then, is to become in some sense an angel. For it means you have moved beyond the limits of your daily human condition to touch wings with the divine.

            No longer circumscribed by can and must, you have set your soul free to give for the sheer, beautiful sake of true giving. In giving freely, purely, for no reason and every reason, you move into another person’s emotional landscape – not because you must, not because you have no choice, but because in your heart, that majestically superhuman organ, the castle of your love, you have felt the spiritual necessity of acting out your love.

            To become the person who behaves in this way is to be twice blessed. For, in enacting these beautiful, spontaneous, wholly gratuitous goodnesses, you transform not only the world, but yourself. The world – embattled, divided, discouraged, bone weary with its dog-eat-dog mentality – becomes newly laced with the sweetness of imaginatively unpremeditated love. Its atmosphere alters. Quietly, almost imperceptibly, because of the little kindnesses that have been unleashed upon it, it will begin to sing.

And you too, will be changed. For in choosing to love not only those whom you have committed yourself to loving, but also those whose names, faces, and true circumstances you will never really know, you will be moved palpably, inescapably into understanding that loving and being loved is the one true human vocation. You will see yourself as an offering, generous, bountiful soul, as well as a needing human being. You will feel connected, centered, received – deeply bonded to the human stream. In giving love, you yourself will understand that we are held in the web of life – and delivered to our divine humanity – by the random acts of kindness, the love, that we give and receive.

I love the way that Daphne describes acts of kindness. I truly believe that love is the most powerful force in existence and when we connect with it through acts of kindness we awaken the angel within us, we draw nearer to our Heavenly Father and bring about the love of God in the life of another person. And in doing this, we expand our capacity to love and be loved. We also open windows within our hearts and our lives allowing God to work more fully and deeply to bring about the very changes and blessings we desire for ourselves.

So take a minute and give gratitude for the angels who have worked acts of kindness in your life and remember how wonderful it felt to receive. And now that you have remembered how wonderful receiving is, go find the angel in you by giving an act of kindness to a soul in need. I invite you to make it a part of your goals to share the love of God through an act of kindness every day.

An act of Kindness is the Love of God

I shared with you how I spent my birthday. Now let me tell you what happened that night. After we got home from our trip my husband and I headed out for some time alone. Or should I say, some quiet time away from the children.

My husband likes to play Magic the Gathering, a card game. He stopped playing because for most of our marriage he had no one to play with. Last year I decided to give it a go so we could do something that he likes together. Lo and behold, I actually like playing it. Well the last couple of games he had been hammering on me. So I decided to go to the card shop for my birthday and see if I couldn’t find a deck of cards that could turn the tide in my favor.

When we got there, the clerk working this night wasn’t very familiar with the game and wasn’t able to answer my questions and help me find the deck that would help me annihilate my husband. We were looking around and I was beginning to think I might just head home and come back another time when two young men came in. They came over to where we were looking at cards and were beginning to search for something themselves. I could tell they were serious card players and would be able to answer the questions I had. So I walked up to one of them and began asking him about the decks I was considering. He was a wealth of advice and information.

While discussing a deck I especially wanted, he explained that it was an awesome deck and would help me be able to hammer on my husband and his decks. The only thing is this deck is centered around a specific card, a card that I did not have. The deck wouldn’t be very good without this card. As we continued to talk he was explaining the way this deck worked and the card and how great they were. He then said, “I have that card and I can give it to you, it’s your birthday.” He was carrying a back pack with him. He opened it up, pulled out a binder, found the card, and then handed it to me and said “Happy birthday”.

I thanked him and took the card. I was somewhat astounded as I did not know him and in the world of Magic the Gathering cards, they can be worth money. I was excited and very grateful that he would be so kind.

What he didn’t know and couldn’t possibly know was that I was struggling with discouragement. I had a plan of celebrating my birthday by giving rather than receiving. I had spent the day working to do that to the best of my abilities. But I had also been struggling with the thoughts of what about me, what am I getting out of this. I had done my best to keep my mind focused on what I wanted to accomplish but by that night I was tired. Thinking, really being present with where one’s thoughts are is hard and tiring work. Like anything else you work at, it can feel a little discouraging at times when you are not sure if you are achieving what you were working for.

This is where my thoughts were when this kind and generous young man gave me a gift for my birthday. We finished talking and I went on to look at some other things before leaving the store when his friend came over and gave me a card as well. He said, “This will be a great card with that deck as well” and wished me a happy birthday. I was again surprised that a stranger would be so kind and he was right, it is a way cool card. I looked at the two of them with wonder and thanked them for their kindness. I found out that the second friend had had his birthday the day before mine and I told him I wished I had my cards with me to give him a gift. I wished him a happy birthday. I hugged them both and thanked them again and found when we might be able to see them at the store for game nights.

What are the chances with all the days of the week and the hours of those days that I would come across such kind and generous spirits at a time when I was feeling low? And how would they even know how I was feeling and what I stood in need of. There are many who would say it was luck or a coincidence, but I don’t think it was either. I believe those are just words we use to try and explain the wonder and amazement of a very devoted and loving Heavenly Father.

I believe the acts of kindness of others is the love of God. For it is He who knew what I was working to accomplish and it was He that knew how I was feeling. I know that it was He who sent those young men to be where I was and inspired them to be so kind and give me the gifts. Jesus said, “As ye have done it unto the least of them ye have done it unto me.” I believe as we have served Him, we also serve for Him. As we have done it unto Him, we do it for Him. The scriptures teach us that we are to be as the body of Christ. We through our actions become His hands to give assistance, His arms to embrace and comfort, His shoulders to bear up and support, etc. And as we do these things we become more like Him.

Through the actions of these two strangers I was given the gift of seeing my Father’s love for me and have come to a deeper understanding of just how mindful of me He always is. He is always there for me, even when I choose to turn away from Him. He is like the sun ever constant and we are as the planets that circle around Him. If we find ourselves closer or further away, it is because we have moved. And if we find ourselves facing out into the cold darkness, we have but to turn around to find ourselves in the warmth of His light again. Just as the sun’s light shines out equally in all directions, so does His love. And if we wish to receive more fully all we have to do is seek Him, for it is there freely for all to partake. I believe these gifts were His way of acknowledging that He is aware of what I am doing was giving me a nod of encouragement to keep it up.

And for any of you who are wondering, my new friend was right. It is an awesome deck of cards. My husband and I went home and played. He won the first game, but I hammered on him several times there after!

So the next time you feel inspired to do something, think twice before you ignore it. You just may be an act of the love of God in the life of another person.

Quotes to live by

“Fix your eyes forward on what you can do, not back on what you cannot change.” ~ Tom Clancy

The Gift You Give to Yourself

Yesterday was my birthday. A birthday for a child can be filled with the same kind of excitement and joy as they feel at Christmas. But as we grow into adults and begin having children of our own, our own birthday can become just another day. I know some adults that manage to keep that same childlike exuberance but there seems to be more people that find it holds more work for them than excitement. I am one who had excitement but didn’t really have much hope for it being what I wanted it to be.

So this year I decided to give myself a gift.  I wanted to spend my birthday being focused on giving rather than receiving, for it is when we give that we are truly blessed and can receive our greatest joy. I have come to understand that I am the one who chooses whether or not I am excited or happy and if I wanted to have that for my birthday, I needed to be the one to do something about it. If I wait for someone else to give it to me, I’ll constantly be at the whim of others for my happiness. And since no one knows me as well as I do, it’s kind of a crapshoot when you try to get your happiness from another person’s actions because they don’t always know what you want.

I wanted to spend my birthday doing something that would allow me to spend time with my family. I wanted it to be a gift to them, something that they would enjoy doing rather than something they were doing for me. So I planned for our family to go to the aquarium and dinner. This was pretty much a whole day thing since it takes about an hour to get to the aquarium and we spent several hours there. It was fun but as anyone with small children and teenagers know, it can also be trying.

Even though I had decided not to ask for gifts and wanted to focus on what I could give instead, there was a part of me that kept thinking “what about me”. I found that my mood kept fluctuating between being happy and being frustrated. This seemed to correlate with my thoughts. When I was focused on the moment and enjoying the experience I was happy but when my thoughts wandered to an expectation of what should be happening or what I should be receiving I would begin to feel frustrated, impatient and tired. I believe it is Karol K. Truman who said, “You can’t have negative thoughts and feel good and you can’t have positive thoughts and feel bad.” There is a saying in my church, light and darkness cannot exist in the same place at the same time. So if you are feeling bad, it is a sure sign that your thoughts are in a negative place. And so it is for feeling good, that your thoughts must be positive.

As I realized what was happening, I quickly worked at refocusing my thoughts because I did not wish to think negatively. These negative thoughts were only serving to make me unhappy and I wanted to spend my birthday happy. This was the gift I was giving to myself. But as anyone can vouch, sustained intentional thought is hard work. Henry Ford is quoted for saying, “Thinking is the hardest work there is, which is…why so few engage in it.”

I am sure the reason for the mood swings can be attributed to this reason, because I was not always being the driver of my thoughts. But just as with anything else, it takes practice to become better and turn something new into a natural habit. And something that when first started may be hard or difficult can become easier over time. The key to this is work. Anything and everything requires some kind of work at one time or another. But if you are clear about what you want then you know the work is well worth the effort. In fact if you are very clear, want it bad enough and are focused on obtaining the goal, the work can become easy and to some degree effortless. It is really only when our thoughts begin to be filled with the negativity of “I don’t want to do this, this is hard, I’m tired, I wish I could be doing something else” etc., etc. that it feels hard or even impossible to do anything.

Long story short, I spent the day with some really great highs and some unintentional lows. But overall, it was a great day. I had fun and even though it wasn't perfect, I did achieve what I set out to do. I spent the day with the loves of my life, my family, in a way that brought joy to us all. I was able to give to others and in return received the excitement and joy I desired for my birthday. And I can definitely say that it was well worth the effort. In fact most of the time, it was effortless when I was present in the moment and received it with gratitude.

 “Happiness consists of forgetting what you give and remembering what you receive.” ~ Unknown Author

If today is your birthday or even if it isn't, what gift will you give yourself this day and every day here after?

Quotes to live by

"Sorrow looks back...worry looks around...faith looks up." ~ Unknown Author

Bumps on the road to pursuing the dream

Can anyone hear the crickets chirping? That’s what it sounds like to me around here. I haven’t posted a new post this week and it feels empty. Especially since I have just started out and there is not a large archive of posts yet.

Over the last couple of months as I have read other people’s blogs I began to dream about writing my own. But I always pushed the thought away. I could never do that. I am not an experienced writer. Would anyone even be interested in what I have to say? I never saw myself being able to do anything about my dreams. And the thought of what it might take to begin felt impossible and overwhelming. So that’s all they were, a dream, something to fantasize about but not actually act on.

Until finally, my desire to pursue my dream grew bigger than my fear of attempting it and failing. So, I created my blog with all the excitement that anyone ever feels at finally doing something about, what they have long desired to do. In the beginning it was pure joy, like a child at Christmas. As I worked to create and design my blog, I finally felt that things were right. This was what I had wanted to do and I was now doing it. Then I began to share my dream with others. It was well meet and there was plenty of excitement and praise.

However, it was one thing to pursue my dream in private. It’s a whole other story to pursue it under the eyes of others, even if they are in support of me. All of a sudden there’s pressure to perform. That I have to get it right and I can’t make a mistake. If I make a mistake, what will they think of me? Maybe they won’t like it or maybe they won’t like me. Because after all, my work is a reflection of me. This is some of the negativity that has begun to encroach on the joy I am feeling.

I find my thoughts suddenly full of what I have to do because I don’t want to make a mistake and fail, rather than the goal of sharing the wisdom I have received so I can help others. There are also the beginnings of feeling fear and anxiety. What was once exciting and happy was now beginning to feel scary. How can going after your dream become so paralyzing?

It isn’t the simple fear of making mistakes, but making mistakes in front of watching eyes. When we make mistakes in private we can ignore them and pretend they don’t exist, maybe even have a laugh and move on. And when pursuing the dream begins to feel too hard, we can walk away telling ourselves that we didn’t even want it in the first place. We can tell ourselves these things in private, but we are held accountable when we’re in public. So the thought of making a mistake in public becomes fearful and intimidating.

Long story short, every time I have had a moment of inspiration and have sat down to write, bam, writer’s block. Is it any wonder that I would run into obstacles in the pursuit of my dream when in the midst of all my excitement, I have had this litany of negative thoughts and self-doubt running through the back of my mind like ticker tape.

How do we go from the excitement of taking the big leap and going after the dream to being weighed down with self-doubt and fear? This is what it’s supposed to feel like before you take that big leap, not after you have already begun working on it. It’s supposed to be smooth sailing from here on out, isn’t it?

Well, actually no it isn’t. You see, now you’re being tested. What are you willing to give in order to receive? It’s that whole reaping what you sow principle. Notice that the reaping or giving comes before the sowing or receiving does. It’s a matter of how much do you want it and what are you willing to do to achieve it. Will you choose to believe in yourself, in your dream, even if there are obstacles? What if the greatest obstacle is the negative self-defeating thoughts in your mind? Leslie Householder author of The Jackrabbit Factor says, “When I have a choice, I choose to believe.” Will you choose to believe any way?

After all, mistakes are really just learning experiences. You have these experiences to bring you to a place of decision. The question that any experience brings with it is always the same, “What will you choose to think, feel, and believe?” Will you think you can or you can’t? Will you feel that there is hope or there isn’t? Will you believe it is possible or not? The subject may change and the experiences may differ, but it’s all about bringing you to a place of learning and growing by asking you to come to a decision, what will you think, feel, and believe.

Well, since you see this new post, you can probably deduce that I have come to a decision about what I am choosing to think, feel, and believe. I think that I can do this and what I have to say is important. I feel that my goal of sharing the lessons I have learned over the last couple of years is obtainable. I believe that there are many who can benefit from these tidbits of wisdom as I have watched my own life turn from depression and feelings of hopelessness to a life filled with gratitude and joy.

So the next time something comes along that brings feelings and thoughts of negativity or doubt, start asking some questions. What am I going to think, feel, and believe about this? And maybe you’ll begin to see that this experience came along not to stop you and tell you that you can’t, but rather it came to show you that yes, you can.

“Whatever my circumstances are, I can always choose my own thoughts.” ~ Leslie Householder

What thoughts will you choose on the road to pursuing your dreams?

Quotes to live by

“A happy person is not a person in a certain set of circumstances, but rather a person with a certain set of attitudes.” ~ Hugh Downs

You can’t wait for life to happen to you, you have to go after it!

I was watching a Christmas movie the other day, when one of the characters said something that struck me as somewhat profound. The movie is called “Christmas List” and has Mimi Rodgers in it. The story is about a 35 year old woman who has just kind of gone with the flow of things allowing circumstances and other people to dictate the outcome of her life. She writes a Christmas list just for fun and all of a sudden she begins to receive the items on her list. Suddenly her life becomes exciting and joyful. This causes her to reassess her life and it brings her to this conclusion.

“Somehow, all this time I’ve been waiting for my real life to start, I never realized that the waiting part had become my real life. And what was supposed to happen had become a dream. But you know what, there’s no more supposed to for me. There’s only what I want and what I’m going to do to get it. If I want to go to the Sky Room, I’m going to the Sky Room and if I want to go to Timbuktu, I’ll take myself there. I’ve learned something, you can’t wait for life to happen to you, you have to go after it.” - Mimi Rodgers character. This quote came from a fictional movie, but I am a strong believer that truth can be found anywhere if we are willing to be open to seeing it.

How many goals that we set for ourselves in our youth become the fond dreams or wishes in our latter years? How many moments do we waste away with sorrowing thoughts of “if only”? How many of us have found that the waiting to get to the goal has become the life we never imagined?

I know that I have spent many moments fruitlessly on “if only” this had happened or I had done that. I have also looked longingly at tomorrow with the hope that somehow it would look different than today. But in either case I never did do anything differently to bring about the things I desired. Every day I did the same things, letting life take me where it may. Somehow hoping that things would change and never realizing that I had the power to bring about the changes I so desperately longed for. Albert Einstein was quoted for saying the definition of insanity was doing the same thing over and over again and expecting different results.

Now I want to clarify something. I did do different things but everything I did fell under one category, what I was comfortable doing. If it was not in my comfort zone, I didn’t do it or rather I rarely did it. Those rare times was a case of me wanting something more than I was afraid of it. And let me tell you, those were some of the best successes of my life. However, they never seemed to be lasting. I believe the reason nothing ever seemed to last was because I was never willing to stay out of my comfort zone long enough to make a go of it. When things became overwhelming or felt too scary I would retreat back to the comfort of what I knew even if it wasn’t what I really wanted. Being in a comfort zone is easy and pursuing a goal can be hard work. But in reality the easiness or hardness of anything really depends on how much we want something.

A teacher in my church said, “I believe God lives to comfort the afflicted and afflict the comfortable.” To me comfort is about rest. Think about it for a moment. What do you do after a hard day of work? You come home, take a shower, put on comfortable pj’s or sweats, sit in a comfortable chair, curl up with a comfortable blanket and watch TV or eat your favorite comfort food. Comfort is about resting after hard work or effort. Whether that is physical or emotional work.

God seeks to comfort us and give us rest when we have become weary through our efforts to learn and grow. “Come unto me, all ye that labor and are heavy laden, and I will give you rest.”(Matthew 11:28) But as you see from this quote, He seeks to comfort us after we have labored. Comfort is for resting, there is no learning and growing in comfort. And yet we try to live our entire lives in a comfort zone. We park our lazy boys and TVs with the intent of staying there indefinitely.

Leslie Householder author of The Jackrabbit Factor said, “God is more interested in our growth than our comfort.” I believe this is because He knows that there is no learning when we are comfortable. If we are not learning then we are not growing. Learning and growing is about taking action and taking action is when we truly live. Not only do we live but we can also thrive. If we stay comfortable to long we can become bored and life becomes stagnant. We are constantly left to react to life. Where is the joy in reacting to every situation? In most cases this kind of living leaves us stressed, worried and more than likely depleted of hope and joy. I believe that in most cases, being comfortable for too long will leave you forever looking at your life with the regret of “what if”.

Just as the song from The Byrd’s based on a scripture says, “Turn, turn, turn, to everything there is a season, and a time to every purpose under the heaven”, there is a time for being comfortable and there is a time for working which inevitably brings with it learning and growing. But the labor must come before the rest. So put aside your comfort zone, think about what it is you really want, and get to work. Dream the dream and go after it. After all, “…men are, that they might have joy”. 2Nephi 2:25

So what is it that brings you joy? Maybe it’s time to dust off some of those dreams and goals and find out what makes life worth living. And remember the next time you're tempted to turn back to your comfort zone; if at first you don't succeed try, try again!

Welcome Guest Author Valerie Ackley

Today I want to share an article from a new friend who has inspired me into action. She is the author of the children's book What are You Thinking? You could say that it is a children's version of the book The Jackrabbit Factor or The Secret, but I feel it is so much more. This book takes the concepts of the Law of Attraction and helps a child see that they help create the reality of their world. This can help any child start off on the right foot for an amazing journey in life with a happy and joyful disposition to any situation they may face as they grow into adulthood. I recommend this book to anyone looking to help a child accentuate the positive in their life and find the means to achieve their goals and dreams. You can find your copy at Costco or Amazon.com. You can also visit Valerie's blog http://www.oginventswheel.blogspot.com/

There is Nothing more Delicious than Humble Pie by Valerie Ackley

Humble pie. It is never a selection of choice on the menu of life. We are usually served it. I ate a big piece today and what might have been bitter was sweet. A few days ago I had a misunderstanding that I realize now was created by my failure to live by the principles I try so hard to bring awareness to.

Instead of focusing on the end goal of a project I am working on, I allowed myself to become focused on obstacles that were on my radar; obstacles that appeared to be blocking my ability to move forward. Focusing on obstacles and adopting an attitude of fear and worry about issues out of my control, resulted in my being blinded to the truth. I created a mountain of misunderstanding and woe with someone I deeply love and care about. In the heat of emotion, I was completely unaware of the damage I was creating.

Today, after much prayer and meditation, and a phone call from another partner in the project, I received a shower of divine clarity. As the realization hit, I was shocked and stunned at the mess I had made from thinking and believing that the project was unraveling. I couldn't have been further from the truth. How amazing it is that when our focus is locked on obstacles, (the antithesis of what we are trying to accomplish), we lose our compass and end up where we never expected to go.

With this clarity, I was able to admit fault and ask for forgiveness. I don't know if it will repair the damage I caused. I hope it does. I can only rely on God now to do the rest because I've done all I know how to at this point. If I have more epiphanies regarding how to move forward I'm committed to acting on those insights.

Acknowledging fault was painful. I was ashamed and embarrassed. But recognizing my mistakes, and taking steps as best I know how to repair them, at the very least, brought a sweetness of peace I haven't felt in days.

Thank you Valerie for being courageous and following your heart. I appreciate you sharing your growing experience with us, so that we may benefit from your wisdom and be wiser in our own life choices. Allowing fear and worry to be the guiding factor in making our choices will undoubtedly lead to much heartache and grief. But as you have shown in sharing your story, there is always an opportunity to make course corrections on our journey. By turning to God through prayer or meditation and showing humility by acknowledging our mistakes, we can bring about the changes for good in our lives that we desire.

May you find your serving of humble pie to be sweet and bring peace to your soul.

What feels like the worst thing that ever happened to you, could be a gift

Two years ago, my husband was out of work. I was in California on vacation visiting family when my husband called to give me the news. It really put a damper on things as you can imagine and we had to cut our trip short and head back home. This was a very stressful time for our family. The night my husband told me, I made up my mind that I was going to believe that God would help us. That He would provide what we needed and everything would be okay. I refused to believe anything less.

A few weeks later I had tickets to go to a convention. My husband was blessed with another job but we were still trying to recover from his unemployment. I headed to the convention, excited to leave my worries behind me for a few days. I enjoyed all of the speakers but there was one in particular that touched me the most. Her name is Jackie Nink Pflug author of Miles To Go Before I Sleep.

Jackie stood up on stage and said, “What feels like the worst thing to ever happen to you is really just a learning and growing experience.” I don’t know about you but this was profound to me. The idea that the misery and stress in my life, which I have always taken so seriously, is just about learning and growing was a new concept. She then went on to share an experience in her life that led her to this belief. In 1985 Jackie was working in the Middle East when she was on an airplane that was hijacked by terrorists. Jackie and many others were taken hostage. Many were injured and killed during this hijacking. Jackie was shot in the back of her head and left to die on the tarmac. Jackie managed to survive her injuries but was left with severe brain trauma. In spite of the difficulties she has taught herself to read again and now has a driver’s license. She is a public speaker and author.

This is just a brief over view of what Jackie experienced. I share her story because it had a great impact on me. That if a woman who not only survived but thrived after having such an experience can stand up and say, “What feels like the worst thing to ever happen to you is really just a learning and growing experience”, then I needed to pay attention. This was one of those moments that if I choose, would be life changing. And it has been. I walked away that day forever changed. It has been an amazing journey ever since.

The difference between who I was when I first listened to Jackie to who I am now is the difference of a new perspective. Jackie gave me an opportunity to look at my life from a different point of view. That the experiences that were once dragging me down or holding me back, were about providing me the learning and growth that I needed, to see what I was capable of doing. How are we to know what we can do unless we’re asked to do it?

In the Disney cartoon Mulan, there is a scene where Mulan is told to climb to the top of a tree pole and retrieve an arrow. She is given a rope tied to a weight for each hand. After weeks of failing as a soldier, Mulan is about to sneak away from camp in the middle of the night when she looks up at the pole and stops. She has an epiphany, walks to the pole and takes a rope in each hand winding the weights together on the other side of the pole and uses them as a counter balance to climb to the top of the pole retrieving the arrow. What was the difference from the beginning when she couldn’t make it to the top and when she finally succeeded? The difference was her perspective. She was the same; it was how she perceived the situation that had changed.

How many times do we look at the experiences in our lives and call them trials and burdens? We feel as Mulan did in the beginning, that we have trials and burdens that are weighing us down and keeping us from succeeding. But what if we were to have a change of perspective? What if we use Jackie’s words? That instead of looking at them as trials and burdens that are keeping us from our goal, we could look at them as learning and growth that provide the very tools to succeed and reach our goal! Just as Mulan, we can use the experiences of our lives, for they truly are about learning and growing, to reach the goals we desire. Our life experiences are not about weighing us down or breaking us, they are about building us up and making us into the best version of ourselves that we can be.

So the next time you feel this is the worst thing that ever happened to you, take a step back and think for a moment. This is just about learning and growing. What is it that you can learn from this? Maybe with this experience, you are being provided the very keys to succeed.

May your growing be gentle and your learning be great.

Welcome to my new blog!

I never imagined I would be writing a blog. Yet here I am. How exciting!

I have had so many experiences over the last few years. Some that made me laugh and some that made me cry. But all of them have brought me such great life lessons and amazing blessings that I want to share them with others. I feel this is the next step in the journey for me. I believe this will help me on the road to sharing what I've learned with as many people as possible in the fastest way possible.

To all who inspired me to do this, I love you. Your encouragement has meant the world to me.

To all who will take the time to read these pages, thank you. Your time is precious. I appreciate you sharing it with me.

To all who will join me on a journey in healing, god bless you. May you be blessed to receive all your hearts desires.

Every journey begins with a single step. Come and take a step with me.